Two days later, and my whole world feels like it's tilted a little, just enough to make everything look new and sparkly. Louie asked me on a date. My first date. Ever.
I swear, my heart did this weird fluttery thing when he said it. We were just texting, talking about some random song that reminded him of summer, when he casually asked, “Would you want to go out sometime?”
And I just stared at the screen like it was a trap or a dream or both. My fingers froze. My brain went quiet. But my heart? My heart was screaming. I said yes. Of course I said yes. And then… THEN he asked me what flowers I liked. Just out of nowhere, like it was the most normal thing to ask a girl. I told him roses and lilies. I almost said “you don’t have to get me anything” but I didn’t. Because maybe it’s okay to want pretty things. I am a north-eastern European girl after all, nobody says no to flowers on a first date! It is very important actually, now that I think of it...
I’ve never been on a real date before. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to wear. Or say. Or do. My mind keeps jumping from outfit ideas to panic spirals and back. Like—what if I say something awkward? What if I trip on literally nothing (again)? What if my hands are too cold when he holds them? But also… what if it’s amazing?
What if we laugh too much and the time goes too fast? What if I catch him looking at me like I’m something special, and I actually believe it?
My parents haven’t said anything yet, but I know they know. They keep giving each other that look—the “she’s growing up” look. The “do we need to talk to her about boys?” look. I want to tell them, but also… I don’t. Not yet. This little world Louie and I have built feels fragile and secret and sweet. Like it lives between songs and text messages and late-night thoughts, and I don’t want anything to mess with it.
So I have started listening to Taylor Swift again. "I've got my money on things goin' badly. Got a history of stories ending sadly. Still hoping that the fire won't burn me just one time, just one time. All I know is this could either break my heart or bring it back to life! Got a feelin' your electric touch could fill this ghost town up with life. And I want you now, wanna need you forever!"
This might be just a small thing. One date. A maybe. A beginning that could end. But right now? It feels like a movie. It feels like soft petals and stolen glances. It feels like the first page of something I’ll want to read over and over again. Wish me luck. 💐✨
xoxo
Lenna
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