Old Livestreams

In the bustling chaos of our lives, finding moments of peace can feel like searching for a needle in a haystack. Amidst the hustle and bustle, we often seek calmness in the simple pleasures we can provide ourselves. For me, that came in the form of an unexpected source last night: an old livestream of Taylor Swift.

There's a certain magic in the melodies of Taylor Swift that transcends time and space. Her music has an uncanny ability to evoke a myriad of emotions, from nostalgia to empowerment, from heartache to hope. But beyond the lyrics and songs are her as a person, and nothing can make me more at ease than listening to her, whether it's speaking or singing. Last evening, in the end of a particularly stressful week, I stumbled upon an archived livestream of Taylor Swift from 2008. As I clicked play, I it was as if I had never seen it before (which I have). 

Studying, I listened to her answering fan questions, introducing her cat and just talking! Note to self: do that more often. There was something inherently comforting about studying to Taylor Swift's livestream. Perhaps it was the sense of connection, knowing that at that very moment, countless others were also finding solace in the same melodies. Or perhaps it was the familiarity of her voice, the one I have grown up with as a little home. I've listened to it over car arguments, noises at school, nasty comments and the noise at the bus. I've listened to it all over the place when I was feeling stressed or happy or anything at all. Why has this become a fan blog lol? 

Sincerely, Lenna

P.S. you can watch it here!

Damage

 

Echoes

The world is silent. Memories never seems to fade. I looked back at my blog post "Head Over Heels..." today, and I cringed. We faded right away, as everything does in my life when I truly believe in it. Love is a beautiful yet treacherous thing, filled with twists and turns that can lead us to the highest peaks of ecstasy or plunge us into the deepest abyss of despair. And oh, how I have never even kissed anybody?

There's a certain ache that comes with remembering the moments shared with someone who once held the key to your heart. The laughter that once echoed through empty rooms now feels like a distant dream, drowned out by the deafening silence of my bedroom walls. It's not just the loss of him, it's the loss of myself into my eating disorder. It's so much more. Life, I guess... It never seems to get better, but I have chosen to live as happy as I can. They say time heals all wounds, but sometimes it feels like time is nothing more than a cruel illusion, taunting us with the hope of a brighter tomorrow while we remain trapped in the shadows of yesterday. No matter how many days pass, the ache remains, a constant companion in the lonely hours of the night.

I've tried to fill the void with distractions and fleeting pleasures, but nothing can replace the love that once filled my heart to the brim in my childhood before it was ruined all too suddenly. And so I find myself wandering aimlessly through life, searching for something I fear I may never find again. But maybe, just maybe, somewhere out there, another heart is yearning to find it's way back to mine. I like to daydream. Maybe it's time to listen to Thinking out Loud by Ed Sheeran again.

Until then, I'll hold onto the echoes of our love, treasuring them like precious relics of a time long gone. For even though our story may have reached its tragic conclusion, the memories we shared will live on forever in the ballad of our broken hearts.

Yes, I said our.

Love, Lenna

Time Flies

Hey, guys,

Can we talk about something that's been weighing on my mind lately? Time. Yeah, I know, it's a heavy topic, but hear me out. Have you ever noticed how it seems to fly by in the blink of an eye? One moment you're belting out your favorite tunes in your bedroom April 1st, and the next you are sitting in silence April 25th staring at a wall. It's crazy, isn't it? How time flies by, and even the new Taylor Swift album is out (which I probably have listened to more than what is healthy)

But here's the thing: as much as I sometimes wish I could slow down time, I've come to realize that it's all part of the journey. Each passing moment is like a page in the story of our lives, and while some chapters may be harder to read than others, they all contribute to the person we become. 

I remember when I was younger, people used to tell me to cherish every moment because before I knew it, I'd be looking back wondering where it all went. And you know what? They were right. It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, but sometimes we need to pause, take a breath, and appreciate the beauty in the little things. Because here's the truth: time may fly, but memories last forever. Whether it's laughing with family, falling in love for the first time, or chasing your wildest dreams, those moments are what make life worth living. So why not savor them while we can?

Sure, there will be ups and downs along the way. That's just the nature of life. But even in the toughest times, there's always something to be grateful for, whether it's the love of family and friends, the warmth of the sun on your face, or the simple joy of a good song. I want to be more active here, throughout the rest of the year. Oh, and by the way, I created a YouTube channel! It's here and I don't really understand why I didn't do it sooner.

Until next time,

Lenna

It's April

Ladies and gentlemen, I now introduce you to the best YouTube vlogs ever!!!